My Shadow's Sweat

Dear Dad, 

Today, I wish to record my learning, as I stood by the doorway of my memory, and observed all the events from the past year cross by, in a single file. Shadows are not mere coincidences, and I believe they are not just a reflection of our bodily selves, but also our souls. As our lives are unfolding before us, emotions stand to be eternal and so are our shadows. 

As we live through various memories, our actions and emotions; we earn experience, and learn more about others, and ourselves. One's shadow reflects their learning, with each of their actions filling in a shade to their shadow...and it leaves its trail on our life. 

A mere thought alone, brings glory and utmost bliss to me, and life seems to smile back. When I think of that memory: looking at me in my eyes, saying just that, what I wanted to hear; my life seems to have been rewarded. I stand here to understand the actuality of this emotion.

Destiny creates drama when it wants you to know so, else you may lead an ignorant life until death. I seek to forgive and forget, for when I close my eyes now, those memories relax my soul. I would want to meet again, no matter, whenever that happens. I shall omit all rules in such a possibility...

If I know of love, I know of how you did...I believe; it was no ordinary an emotion. Let the destiny know how strong our connection is. My Shadow carries your scent, and without you, I do not enjoy the sweat of my shadow anymore.

Yours...

Abhijith

  

Written on my flight to Lucknow - 22nd Jan 2011

Failure...

Failure... for most of us goes beyond being just a word. Sometimes, it is important that we stop giving words more power than they truly deserve. I wish to speak about my observations/ways to transform oneself from being someone who is struggling with a fear of failure into a confident being. 

For an unsuccessful being, everyone around seem to be frustrated with him/her as he/she was always trying, but never saw anything go through, because once he/she started, he/she became paralyzed with fear that he/she would fail. I sympathize with this anxiety about failure. In my experience, it is quite common to be worried about failure and the idea of disappointing others, so it helps to address it. 

There is a necessity, not to give more weight to words than that they truly deserve. To me, it is impossible to fail. You can't even call it bad decision-making. You make a decision, evaluate it based on what happens, and then make another decision based on the results. If something doesn't work out, you learn as much as you can from it and either find a better way to do it or do something else. That is all you can do.

There are two possible ways of looking at it. Either allow the negative results of your decisions (your "failures") to knock you down and keep you from trying anything new, or you begin to count your failures as successes. If you think about it, it makes perfect sense to look at the plans that don't work as a positive, because they usually direct us off in another direction. And there is always the possibility that the new direction will provide the results we are seeking.

Behind every failure is the potential for success, and if we give up too soon, we may never know what wonderful thing we could have accomplished. There is a story involving Edison, which illustrates this point perfectly. At one point Thomas Edison was supposedly asked by a reporter how it felt to have experienced 1,000 failures in inventing his light bulb, and the inventor allegedly replied, "I have not failed 1,000 times. I have successfully discovered 1,000 ways to not make a light bulb." Can you imagine what life might be like if Edison had given up on the first try?

Plan and try... and believe that failure is just one learning step in life, while Success is only one step away.

‘T-issue’: Trust Issue (Part -1)

Note: This blog post is a short story, presented in two capsules. The present blog post presents the first half of the short story. 

Everyone has their own story to narrate, and I have mine. I am a Tissue, and this is my story...I come soaked in rose water with scented fragrance, packaged in a thin plastic wafer…tear along its serrations and I am ready for use.

Today, I want to share my story. A story, that was far different from what my peers were used for. A couple of months ago, I was born in a small factory on the west coast, and I was shipped to mid-west, and was stacked along with others from my fraternity…ready for sale. While waiting to be picked up, I heard from other tissues around me, that most of the time we are used to carry the dirt and grease that our owners greedily wish to get rid of; of course no one really knew their definite use.

One day, I was pushed onto the front row, since others ahead of me were picked up. A lady, probably in her mid 20’s, lean and short with long hair…talking on her phone, pushed me and a couple others into her cart, in a rush and dragged on. As I sat on the upper clip of the cart, I started to notice my owner. A wheat complexioned young woman, dark brown eyes and black curly hair (straight at the roots) falling down on her shoulders. She was on the phone all through with her mushy talk, until she reached the billing desk. She said a sweet bye, and flipped her phone. As the guy on the other side of the counter, started to tag each item in her cart, she had an innocent face with a mischievous smile…and started to flirt with him. I was put into a shopping bag, and I never knew what happened after that, until I was pulled out from it and put in a container on the bathroom rack along with others.

Every night, she carried the container into the living room, and placed it beside herself. She cried, mostly aloud and in silence at times. Day after day, me along with others, waited patiently, listening to her, seeing her cry, until we were picked up. We could do nothing, except for feeling sorry for her…and helping her in our role, in a small way. I always believed that, my job was of a noble doing, since I was of some help to someone to let go their dirt, grease or may be their grief too. As we sat in the container, I wondered what event put my owner through such turmoil, that she needed us, ones with fragrance to comfort her, rather than our peers who came without any fragrance, and as I was told earlier were more suited for her need.

One day, she came running towards the rack, picked up our container and ran into the living room. She emptied our container, and all of us fell to the floor. Today her emotions were out of control, far worse than usual and she was weeping probably from long. She picked up one of us closer to her reach, and pulled out the tissue frantically and wiped her eyes and face clean. As she bundled up our friend into a rag-ball and threw it onto the ground, I heard a faint shout from it, “Her Soul smells worse, more than what I could handle with my fragrance… may be I am the worst used in my community”.

She hurried into picking us one after the other, and yet her grief had no end. After a while, she got up and looked around to find a letter that was crippled. She picked it up, and sat down on the floor closer to me….

… to be continued.

Place: Giza, Egypt 

Date: 7th Jan 2011 

Blue Ocean Strategy : Human Values & Excellence (Part 1)

Credits & Note: This argument is an attempt to extrapolate the concept presented in Blue Ocean Strategy by W. Chan Kim and Renée Mauborgne. In my attempt, I wish to draw a possible explanation and method to seek a better understanding of human emotions and thus excellence in handling relationships. My argument will be presented as a collection of three blog-posts, this being the first of them.

Before I proceed, allow me to present my reasons to justify why such an extrapolation is justified. The reason is based on my belief that the sequence of influence and repercussion of emotions on our actions, if computed by means of suitable indicators, can be effectively studied and analyzed. Nature is an interlinked space with each thread showing us a method to understand itself and beyond. One such analogy, to compare our maturity levels with the help of indicators from study of linguistics was presented here. Here, I attempt to present my approach to draw an analogous similarity between blue ocean strategy for businesses and a possible strategy to understand human values and better handle relationships. 

I begin with stating my hypothesis for the argument, 'Among individuals, the respect to other people's emotions is the only solution for inner peace.' Most of us, who are focused on continuous improvement (Self), instead of on continuous redefinition of our approach towards others, and search for blue ocean run the risk of being the best as we are, yet become irrelevant to the world. And the most interesting observation, is that most of us, no matter how evolved we are in our abilities to understand emotions, are immune to this.

....to be continued.

With a hope: Life around me has breathed easier because I have lived....I live, with my inner peace.

                                                    - Abhijith Jayanthi

Awaaz Do!

All children 6 to 14 years old have the right to free and quality education under the recently passed Right to Education Act.The RTE Act specifies minimum norms in government schools. It requires all private schools to reserve 25% of seats for children from poor families (to be reimbursed by the state as part of the public-private partnership plan).

The Act also provides that no child shall be held back, expelled, or required to pass a board examination until the completion of elementary education. There is also a provision for special training of school drop-outs to bring them up to par with students of the same age.

The RTE Act is the first legislation in the world that puts the responsibility of ensuring enrolment, attendance and completion on the Government.The Right to Education of persons with disabilities until 18 years of age has also been made a fundamental right. A number of other provisions regarding improvement of school infrastructure, teacher-student ratio and faculty are made in the Act.

To make the Right to Education Act successful, it is important that each one of us knows about it so that every child who is not in school can be sent back for free and quality education.

The time is NOW! Make a difference.

Stand up and make some noise! Join the Awaaz Do movement by signing up now for India's children. Ask your friends to be a part of getting every single boy and girl into school. Do it now for India's future.

Come forward and donate to UNICEF to help change 8 million lives.

Spread the word to your family and friends. You can SMS, e-mail, share or just talk to them and ask them to speak up and raise their voice for children. One voice makes a difference but together we can help change the fate of 8 million children. The time to begin is NOW!

Find a school near you and make a visit. Check if the school has:

• Separate toilets for boys and girls.
• Drinking water and places for students to wash their hands with soap.
• Playgrounds for playing sports and having fun.
• A school library for students and their teachers.
• Mid-day meals for children.

You can meet the school head, teachers, community members and even the parents of children enrolled there and talk to them about the RTE Act. Let them know about the highlights and let them know how every child can benefit.

Awaaz Do!

Copyright Note: This Blog Post contains information to create awareness regarding Awaaz Do Campaign of UNICEF. UNICEF reserves all copyrights on the material including the photograph and graphic design.

Answers from Nature

During the spring few months ago, I was particularly thrilled when I went for a stroll  in the park to see small new shoots popping up from the soft damp earth and new tiny buds opening on the trees. Actually, I love tuning into nature. It fills me with excitement and makes me feel more vibrant and alive. And becoming more aware of the earth and its rhythms is something I strongly recommend, especially given that we live in a world with so many distractions. It can be easy to forget we are part of a larger living thing that is called Mother Earth...my teacher. 

Any time of the year is a perfect time to really get out of doors somewhere in a natural setting for an invigorating walk. And when you do, keep all of your senses open. You'll probably be surprised at how loud the bird chirping becomes, especially in the absence of loud, distracting noises like roaring motors, screeching sirens and honking horn and blaring radios. You may be especially aware of the warmth of the sun, or if it's a cloudy day, the depth of the colors all around you. When you breathe in this fresh air, chances are that you will experience a plethora of smells – damp plants, soft earth, tiny wildflowers and more. And be sure to be watchful of life during your walk. If you are lucky, you may spot something really special. These happenstance encounters with life around you will provide answers you always sought. 

As winter is awakening in all of its glory now, I feel the buzz of the life force humming all around me. As I sat in the park, greeted by warm sunshine and cool breeze, surrounded by green and thriving plants and their luscious aromas, I was introduced to a new understanding of self. After years of following nature's rhythms around me, I can easily visualize how me...myself was transformed and have come to become myself now.

I was at a constant battle with two methods throughout my life. One to seek for myself, and the other to be,  for others in my life. Most of the issues I had to address, and situations I was in, came down to picking either one of the above mentioned methods for a solution. I was always occupied in picking one of the two, which will suit best, rather than attempting to integrate both the methods. Marvelous are the ways of nature, I learnt an important lesson. Love and understanding for self should be a sweet compromise, not a painful surrender for the sake of others.It is possible to integrate these two methods, to find yourself in the joy of others. 

Tuning into mother nature on a regular basis will help you to feel more alive and more connected to the earth and the other living creatures on it. It is definitely my prescription for heading on the right track. I found my answer..and so will you! 

- abhijith 

Unresolved Emotions

When we are to live through an unresolved emotion, life becomes rather chaotic.Our regular routines are disrupted by recollection of memories...bringing back images...of living these memories, more often than  during usual times. It becomes important with all of this extra hoopla and frenetic activity,  that we learn to keep the peace within ourselves.

I just want to clarify, that being at peace and being happy aren't necessarily the same thing. There is a definite difference between our feelings and the state of our inner being. The state of inner being is what helps us maneuver through life in a calmer and more peaceful way, regardless of what may be happening around us and/or how we feel about it.

Experiencing inner peace comes from practicing the art of letting go. When we hold onto feelings and situations, reliving them over and over in our minds and feeling the feelings again and again we keep ourselves in a state of inner turmoil, even when some of the situations and feelings are happy ones. So how do we get to a place where we can achieve inner calm? It is actually through our ability to acknowledge our feelings about the things that happen to us and around us and then we can let them go.

This may sound strange, but in actuality nothing ever stays the same. No matter how happy or sad we may feel in any given moment, no matter what may be going on in our lives, it will always change. So hanging onto resentments, fear, and anger or trying to hold fast to feelings of happiness and joy actually keeps us in a state of inner turmoil. Acknowledging our feelings and then allowing them to flow into our past frees us to live in peace. This is the art of letting go.

I wish to share an exercise with you in the event you would like to try this. The next time you find yourself in the midst of turmoil, find a quiet spot and close your eyes and breathe slow deep breaths, for just a few minutes. Allow any feeling that comes up to wash over you and then flow away. Then take a really deep cleansing breath and return to your day. Do this as often as you need to and you will discover that you can do it faster and more easily each time.

Inner peace is the key to living a better, more fruitful and comfortable life. If you practice the art of letting go, over time you will find yourself doing it quite naturally. You will discover that there are times when you become consistently peaceful from within and don't even have to pick up and feel feelings before you let them go.

I sit here...with an unresolved emotion...seeking answers to fill my empty heart with hope, to seek inner peace. And so can you!

- Abhijith Jayanthi - Goa - 27th Nov 2010

Our Youth...

Life is a collection of shades, we progress as we move along. The term 'Youth' portrays a confusing shade. It speaks of both the needed energy, and priority in approach at the same time. Nevertheless, it is the shade which each of us wish to remain with. The legend of Ponce de Leon, the Spanish explorer  speaks of  how he was supposedly looking for the fountain of youth and discovered Florida instead. Well, he certainly wasn't the first person to be lured by a dream of eternal youth.  There are numerous stories about powerful figures in history such as Alexander the Great and Cleopatra who also sought to hold onto their beauty and vitality. And the search for youth continues.  All you have to do is to turn on the television or open a beauty magazine to find advertisements for miracle hair tonics, wrinkle cures, stomach flatteners, etc.  It seems we are still looking for a fountain of youth, but this time it is through creams or supplements or health regimens that make extravagant, unproven claims.  However, I don't think that is the right way to stay young.

 
It is more about growing from within that is needed, we need to connect with nature. Staying physically fit is important, but so also is keeping mentally and emotionally fit.  We need to handle stress well and need to let go of our worries at the end of each day.  Each of us, have our difficult or challenging experiences, but it is our positive response to these difficulties and challenges that enable us to carry on.

So there may be a fountain of youth after all, but not exactly as we envisioned it.  As the "ageless" Sophia Loren has said, "There is a fountain of youth: it is your mind, your talents, the creativity you bring to your life and the lives of people you love.  When you learn to tap this source, you will truly have defeated age."

Now that's a fountain I think we can all dip into....

                                                                                                          -Abhijith 

Desperation Cottage

Every day, there are things in our lives that we dismiss as luck or chance or simply take for granted.  Certainly there are times when events throw us completely off balance or make us feel vulnerable or afraid.  But I think that most of the time we are so involved with our daily routine to be successful, whether it be with work, errands, chores and the like, that we forget to notice the things around us that make our lives better.

The truth is that, no matter what is going on in our lives, there are no ordinary moments, no minutes or seconds that are meaningless.  And most of all, we will never get back those moments that pass without recognition.  So, that is why it makes sense to look for and acknowledge the daily gifts that come from the universe.

In our everyday struggle to define happiness.. a happy future for ourselves, we are missing a basic requisite for our struggle.. to be happy. We fail to notice everyday events in our lives. At first glance these things may seem rather unimportant, but when I think about what life might be like without them, I appreciate them all the more, and the bigger and more wonderful they seem to be.  And if you think about it, you may agree that the little things are what either drive us crazy or make us happy.  So, the little things in life really are important, even if they may not seem to be at the time.

    

For me, the best thing about recognizing such moments is that when I pay attention and open myself up to them, I notice them all the more and feel like I may even attract more of them my way.  The end result is that I am happier and more content with my life and consider each day different in its own way. I am happy now... and I seek...to be happy in the future.

    

Little miracles happen every day.  Flowers bloom, babies are born, the sunshine warms our skin and we get to be a living, breathing part of the living, breathing universe.  I hope you will take the time to recognize the warm, special moments that make you feel good about yourself and the world around you. It is time for you to come out of the desperation cottage..to seek happiness, and notice that happiness is around us.. here and now!  Live the moment!

Yours,

Abhijith

Dated: July 2009, written to a friend of mine.

Seasons...

As I look out at the misty weather and see the leaves coloring the branches while the drizzle glues the fallen leaves to the ground, it is clear that we are in the middle of the fall season and frigid winter days are soon to come. In spring, we see the buds popping open on the trees and new plants push their way up through the soil to enjoy the sun's fresh kiss. The fall is just the opposite. It is a time of retreat from the growth cycle.

Some people experience sadness with the changing of the summer season to fall, but I think it is a wonderful thing. The shifting seasons bring us variety and provide us with the changing backdrop for our lives. The autumn has its own kind of charm. It marks the harvest of the spring and summer seasons and it brings a rich palate of various shades of orange, red, yellow and brown to the terrain. These elements are reminders that we are of the earth, and it is through the earth that we receive sustenance.

Fall is the time to pull out your favorite scarves and wool jumpers as you make the transition to a warmer wardrobe. Head for the park where you can enjoy the crispness of the air, the smell of the earth, the beautiful colors of the fall leaves and the fall chrysanthemums.

Every season has its own charm, likewise every phase in our life has its own charm...we will have to learn the beauty of it..live it and enjoy the warmth!

-abhijith 

Place: Oslo, Norway

Dated: 8th July 2007

Confused Reflections

Posted: Today

Recipient: Me...

Today, I want to write about transforming what we view as failed experiences into valuable fodder for our future success. Naturally, it is never pleasant to experience failure, but that does not make it a bad thing. As hard as it may seem to believe, there are benefits to experiencing failure. We can learn valuable lessons from these experiences that can benefit us in the end.

It is important for us to look at our life situations from different angles, by finding opportunities and learning lessons when things don't come out as planned. I wish to elaborate on this point, by narrating a short story.  

"...her hope was to become a fantasy novelist, but that dream was compromised when every agent and publishing house she contacted rejected her first novel. When I first met her, she was in a frustrated and dejected place. So, my advice to her was to keep trying and to also explore other ways to utilize her writing talents.

She decided, she needed to take a break from focusing on her novel, so she put it away and began volunteering at a local children's hospital. She became a storyteller and made up all kinds of fantastic adventures to entertain the kids in the children's ward. She was well received as a storyteller and was soon writing her stories down to share at other local hospitals.

Interestingly, this gave way to a very promising career in the area of writing and publishing. She became a very fulfilled and successful children's author and is now very happy that she "failed" at writing fantasy novels. Her story is proof that not only can failed experiences encourage us to be more flexible and determined, but that they can also point us in the perfect direction..."

I hope this story will remain with you so that the next time you feel yourself struggling with the idea of "failure," you will think differently about it. When you open yourself up to the gifts the universe brings, you can find amazing opportunities. Give yourself a pat on the back for moving along the right path to success and keep  moving on until you get it right. Reflection is a transformation of what is...into what it is truly meant to be...I understood my reflection...

sincerely,

Me...

I'm Nice...not Dumb

When we encounter someone new, we quickly seek answers to two questions rooted in the evolutionary need to make correct decisions: What are this person's intentions towards me? and is this person capable of being true and act on these intentions? 

Because we lack the brainpower to weight someone's true merits quickly, we seize on our sometimes mistaken answers to these questions and rate the person high or low on imaginary scales of intention and capability. Moreover, intention and capability assessments influence how we intend to interact with others. We like to assist people we consider to be warm (intention) and avoid people who we see as not being warm. We desire to associate with people we consider to be capable and ignore those whom we consider to be otherwise.

To further add to our parameters of assessment, we tend to find clues on people's race, gender, nationality, their brought-up and the social environments they were part of. Thus our decisions about whom to trust, doubt, defend against, are based on faulty data. The intention/capability approach helps us understand a lot about others. Why people disrespect the elderly while feeling positive towards them (they are seen as incapable but warm). Inaccurate intention-capability judgments can lead us to trust untrustworthy associates or undervalue potentially important connections.

It is particularly interesting to note that we can observe a gender polarity to this trend. Men normally  attach more value to capability component of the judgment while women value the warmth (intention) component. More so, the way we see others is a reflection of how we ourselves. Men normally tend to understand themselves and others by their capability to be true to the intention/emotion, while  'warmth' component comes second. While women normally tend to value 'warmth' more, thus associating with people who show more concern/warmth towards them, and whether or not the other person or they themselves will remain true about intentions/emotions is always a secondary point of concern.

A Story...

".....In the ancient Tibetan tradition, a wind horse known as 'lung da', a beautiful steed was regarded as a sign of happiness and good fortune (symbolized by the jewel on its back). The image of the wind horse is used on prayer flags in households. The movement of the flag by the wind sets the horse in motion, carrying prayers for happiness and good fortune in various directions...."

"Is this story talking to me? Will this help me solve my problem? ", He thought....Events of the past few days, have taken their toll on him. Whatever he did...whatever he read, brought back her memories. He had many answers to seek.

In the heat of the moment, he felt her indifference was a sign of a battle with her that he needed to win. He was carried away in figuring out how to put the blame on her for things that went wrong. She did not love him anymore. Her ambitions and impressions of life were different. She did not like someone bursting her bubble of  artificial truth.

It is important to realize that we create our storm, and our sunshine. Love is what remains after beauty has passed. Love is not the same as admiration. Love is growth, love is evolution, love is a lesson, love is in allowing and is in granting others to be...what they wish to be... 

He closed his eyes, he wanted to push her memories away. It was hard to separate himself from her thoughts. They were united into a single soul...to dance together forever. Life gave him a chance to seek his companion, and to push her away...will only hurt him. Was there any love left? Is this a story of love?           
                         

Therefore, it shall exist...as a story, a story to live with...without any love in it.                    
                               

"Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh."  - Genesis 2:24

Am I a Bad Person?

 

Life is a mixed bag. It brings us joy, contentment, happiness, love, friendship...sorrow, deceit, hatred, fear, grief. Living our life regularly, most of us are afraid to accept our feelings and thoughts. We fear to ask ourselves the question, " Am I a bad person ? " And on this subject I wish to talk about in my post.
 

This question  is particularly important to understand how sensitive  we have come to become about ourselves and everyday happenings around us. Besides, I think I am right in saying that our feelings and our emotions have been sorely understood by us. Each of us have gone through a period of doubt. It is during such a phase  in our lives that we wish to ask ourselves this question. We begin to reason out a possible answer for the question. 
                                                                                 

My experience: The answer I sought helped me change the way I look at life...fill it with a positive vibe...just as visions of angels show positive changes through the intervention of fortunate events....Events in our lives are mere reflections of our thoughts. We need to fight the fear within...we need to ask ourselves this one question everyday, to put ourselves on the right path...reach out to life with full enthusiasm and cherish our existence. Lets live a happy life!

Spiritual Inspirations : Nature

Nobody has a generic formula for happiness, at least not one that does the trick for everyone. But everyone  of us is privileged to have a common teacher: Nature. It is important to realize that each and every event in our life, is a lesson nature offers us to learn from. Hard to believe?

"How can everyday events possibly affect us? They're of no significance", my critics may roll out that argument. It is important that one needs to connect with nature to understand and explore the possibility of learning from it. Allow me to present a simple method to begin this journey...

Open your eyes on a starry night. What do you see? A vast, luminous space, full of shadows and light. Now close your eyes so tight they ache. Where are you now? What do you see? Again, a vast, luminous space, full of shadows and light. Consciousness and cosmos are structured around the same laws, follow the same patterns, and even feel pretty much the same to our senses. "As above, so below." Just as the starry night awes us with its vastness, there's something infinitely deep inside you, a place you go when you close your eyes, a place that's beyond being yourself. At the most profound level, you will begin to connect with  nature.  It describes a series of experiences which, if you're brave and open enough, will trigger certain states of consciousness in you -- states that operate like powerful spiritual catalysts, vaulting you into higher levels of being. This will help you learn who you are, by warning you about the comforting lies we all tell ourselves, and by illuminating the experiences that trigger your most explosive leaps in awareness. 

Life around us is a reflection of what we are from within. Connecting with nature will help us redefine ourselves...our lives....and thus seek happiness.

- abhijith 

Place: Marrakech, Morocco

Date: June 2007

Art of Listening

Have you ever had a conversation with someone where you realized that they were looking at you while you were talking but weren't really listening? Nobody likes that feeling, but the simple truth is that most of us are better talkers than listeners. So if we want to work on our communication skills, we can take the initiative to start with our own listening skills.

   

The art of listening has a lot to do with the difference between hearing what someone is saying and actually paying full attention to what they are saying. What we simply hear can very easily come in one ear and go out the other, but when we really focus on listening to what the other person is saying, something physiological happens to us. We may register that information physically, emotionally, or intellectually! That is because when that information captures our attention, we involve ourselves with the information that is being shared with us.

    

When someone else is talking to us, it is important not to interrupt them. It is true that we all have our stories to tell, but when we are listening to someone else talk it should be about them, not about us. So the next time you are listening and have the urge to interrupt them, take a breath and refocus your attention on the other person. You just might learn something important, and at the very least the person you are with will appreciate your attentiveness.

Being a good listener is to abstain from holding judgment. The minute our judgment kicks in, our listening usually stops. That is because it is hard to pay attention when we become preoccupied with our personal opinion over what we are hearing. Moreover, putting aside our judgment puts the other person at ease and helps them feel more comfortable and relaxed, so that they can be open and honest with us.

By becoming a good listener ourselves we set an example for those around us and create a better opportunity for ourselves to be heard. And on a side note, one of the better benefit of being a good listener is that when we apply these principles to listening to our own inner voice, we gain access to a world of wisdom all our own. Explore yourself!    

Stolen Dreams

 

The First Short Film of Talking Cherry Productions

Dignity Paradox

Last night I could barely sleep, I felt like a little kid again, filled with anticipation and expectation.  I was filled with thoughts about various episodes in my life. Two hours later, I started to appreciate my existence and opportunities thereof. Life presents each of us a breathing chance to stand up  and compete. Many a  time, I have heard people talking about how life is a compromise and that we are to make choices accordingly. I have come to believe that life is not a compromise, rather it is our dignity and our belief in the same which creates the difference.  

There is a growing concern these days to maintain vitality and enthusiasm for life. But all the multi-tasking and constant rushing about we do on a daily basis makes it difficult to keep our enthusiasm going. When you think about it, with so many balloons in the air and such high personal expectations, it is no wonder that people feel  very sympathetic to their plight, and rarely understand the role of dignity in our lives.

Most of us feel that budgeting of  our dignity is one way to make things better, and  needed for a better life. Rather, it is important to realize that dignity plays a defining role in our actions and accommodate it accordingly. For your life to be everything you'd like it to be, everything it should be, you must face the world with every possible strength and tool, armed with the means and the determination to succeed, blossom, triumph, and prevail... and dignity is an essential part of it to remain in your best shape everyday, for rest of your life.

Secrets of Happiness: Gratitude

Today, I wish to talk about my understanding of happiness. It is an interesting observation, to note that our gratitude level can directly affect our wealth and happiness. Now that may sound strange, but I have seen it time and time again in my life.

To begin with, I like to know how grateful would you say you are for what you are today? Before you answer this question, it is important to understand what we speak of when we talk about gratitude. The basic premise of gratitude is to acquire a more positive and receptive state of being. 

We can begin the journey by being grateful for the smaller and more immediate things like having a place to live, food to eat, and a car to get around, etc. By placing ourselves in a positive frame of mind through gratitude, we open ourselves to all the good things the universe has to offer. That is when we can actually begin to attract good things towards us. As you become more comfortable with the positive things that basic gratitude brings, you will likely find yourself feeling grateful for even bigger things like being alive, learning hard lessons, your past mistakes, the freedom to make choices in life, and more. This type of gratitude catapults you even further along the path to a successful and happy life. That's because you begin to lose your fear of change or loss and you begin to develop a deep appreciation for the exciting adventure that life truly is.Once you reach the point where you remain in a constant state of gratitude, you will become a magnet that attracts the positive things to you... the things that resonate with who you are and what you desire to do with your life.

   

If you are ready to enjoy more happiness and wealth, I challenge you to take some time to note those things that you are grateful for, from the smallest little gifts to the bigger ones. And may you attract the most wonderful and beneficial things into your life.

Truce with Tragedy

                                   

Certain anecdotes often influence us to  rethink our approach towards life. I believe, each action of ours results from a collection of  such experiences. Today, I wish to talk about  my experiences with the notion called 'Tragedy'. Before I proceed, I wish to impress upon the reader that I thoroughly understand and respect the belief that each of us have had our share of joys and sorrows, and there is no common scale for comparison. This post will be my honest attempt to record my experiences and my actions thereof. 

Everyone's life is similar to waves on the ocean floor, with  characteristic highs and lows, and my life is no different. I have had my share of highs and lows, today I wish to talk about my struggle during one such low-phases in my life. When I was first introduced to the situation, my view of issues had various elements to it : distortions, fixations and compulsions amongst others. I lost my hope on the future for some precious moments in life, which I cherish till date. I have noticed that our ability to think objectively will take an hit when we are going through a tragic phase. Every thought, has a previous condition to work with and build on with little possibility for  freshness in our approach. 

It is important that we clearly understand that there exists a distortion in our perception, and come over it. Our actions are influenced by the values we are attracted to and prize. Each of us, enjoy certain aptitude and ability to work with, and devise a possible remedial action to the best of our knowledge.While all of these endowments and values are present as potentialities in our core self and while we are capable of appreciating and actualizing all of them, temperamentally we favor some over others and our responses stack into a hierarchy, with one or a few being more potent than others.During such a phase, there is a possibility we feel  sorry for ourselves.It is important for us to realize pity is not what lessons of tragedy or actions bring to people, but it is a mistake that comes with such lessons. We should be able to identify it and look beyond the notion of self-pity.

It is always important to appreciate yourself and realize nothing is worth more than your free will. In short, as Friedrich Nietzsche puts it in his work The Birth of Tragedy : No price is  too high to pay for the privilege of owning yourself. I understood, nothing else weighs heavily on us, compared to confusion and loss of consciousness for our depressed soul . I negotiated a truce with tragedy...I own myself now and I am proud of it.

Voices of Fear

Note: Today, I wish to present before you, an unique observation about emotions. In this post, I shall examine how the emotion 'fear' is a driving force for various emotions. 

Fear is an interesting emotion...The more we try to understand the root cause for any emotion and actions related thereof,  fear features as one of  the influencing factors. Voices of fear from within, which  tempt us to  lie, cheat and deceive people in our lives...voices that never help us realize that a relation is a promise... a promise of trust, never to lie and be true to each other...can only be dispelled by trusting the voice that comes from the heart...voice that shall help us understand the essence of living with virtue...like a beautiful rose, with its fragrance filling the space around us.

Love and compassion for others, for the world itself is what we need to respect and try to imbibe into our actions. This alone will help us grow over the fear of unknown, fear of losing what you have or of not getting what you want.  Try it!

Place: Cambridge, MA

Date:  14th Feb 2010

Easement : My Life

To,                                                                                                                  Date: 21st Feb 2010

Director-in-Charge,

Depository of Dreams.

Sir,

I always wondered what my dreams mean? I  have come to believe that each of my dreams give a peek into  what the future holds for me and people in my life. Today, I wanted to share one such dream of mine, that turned into reality.

A prisoner was seated at a table, and an officer of merit was standing across the table. After few moments of silence, a conversation ensued. The prisoner said, "It is a tremendously hostile world that I endure...I am here to survive. It is natural that everyone has an instinct to survive. I learnt to live my life the way I do, after understanding what tremendous feats human beings are capable of once they abandon dignity." Both were silent for a while, and then the officer said, "Acquire a heart...only then you can call yourself human, and understand what suffering means. And what you call a tremendous feat, is in reality a heinous act."

And then I woke up...

Today, I understood...she was the prisoner, and the officer was me.

In complete honesty,

Abhijith

Salutation : Vicereine of Stupidity

To,

HRH The Duchess of Nothingness.

I always trusted that our relation may tend to unite in a bond of close affection; with mutual respect, concern and appreciation ranging from the highest to the humblest. I always felt our relation shall be an example for great principles of liberty, equality, and justice; and shall promote our happiness, and add to our prosperity, and welfare.

However, with your incredible acts of stupidity you have positioned yourself beyond doubt that you never really understood : people are meant to be loved, while things are meant to be used. You always entertained a confused self, used people and continued to love material things around you. I fail to understand your justification to seek forgiveness, when you shall be presented to Almighty.
 

With no regard,

Victim of your selfish intentions/lifestyle.

 

Confidentiality: The contents of this mail are intended for HRH The Duchess of Nothingness. It contains information which may be of a confidential and privileged nature.