Monday, August 29, 2011

Dignity of Doubt

People love surrounding themselves with all kinds of gossips and rumors – enhancing curiosity quotient about them. Looking for a possible explanation for such a trend, I asked people around me, and those whom I have met during my travel to different places around the world – if keeping oneself as a well guarded bubble of false claims helps and what is the expectation behind it? 

Few of them laughed, saying that this imagery had become the "control room" of their lives. That answer told me everything I needed to know about the probable cause of their irregular contentment patterns. A lot of people don't realize it, but all of our intellectual appliances come with a prescribed method of use. There is a limit beyond which it will have a negative impact. Playing on a subtle yet crucial factor of trust you enjoy with others will invariably raise doubts about your dignity quotient – nevertheless it adds value to their argument. Such a trend needs a new way to understand oneself – Dignity of Doubt.

I believe nature has answers to all our questions; all we need to do is connect the dots. To explain my position, let me draw an analogy from nature. The Earth, Sun, and atmospheric phenomenon, such as thunderstorms and the northern lights, all have their own course of action and we are made sensitive to these natural energy forces, if we continue to ignore and respect them for long – not otherwise. There is never an attempt by nature to ‘up the curiosity quotient’, yet we understand her might and the aftermath loss of her fury.

There are certain things, which require a mention in our daily lives, for anything else we rarely need a platform to announce – there is a grand plan which we need to adhere to. Give it a thought, ask yourself – if what you wish to showcase about yourself to others is true and most importantly is it necessary? There is dignity in such a doubt – and it goes a long way.  

I was convinced that this simple method – dignity of doubt had made a big difference in my life. 

You might want to evaluate what you are and if this makes a positive difference for you.

- Abhijith

Sunday, August 14, 2011

What is Appropriate?

Who defines what is appropriate? In the present day world, the rich array of attributes portrayed by an individual, as it is the case with everyone, come with the backdrop of a certain temperament bias. We call this bias our psychological "type". The world of human relationships carries a different value proposition to each of us, and the feelings of others may or may not be on the scale of our priorities. Yet all of us are often caught in a conflict between our need for warmth and closeness with others, and our need for privacy, individual space and the freedom to pursue our own interests - which unfortunately often involve abstract concepts quite divorced from human reality.

The interplay between the conscious and unconscious sides of our personality is a constantly shifting dance, changing at different stages of our life and altering according to the pressures and challenges which one encounters. The tension between the primary characters in our inner drama is the source of energy which provides our life with movement, purpose, conflict and growth.

It is important to learn, nothing that occurs within a relationship is chance. Our “type” describes what one is like inside, and therefore what kind of patterns, needs and compulsions one is likely to bring into his/her relationships with others. When we try to project the primitive side of our nature onto the other person in any relation - which means that we unconsciously push him/her into acting out on the aggression and provocativeness, the relationship suffers a strain. There is a necessity to understand what is appropriate? But the larger question is who defines what is appropriate?

An honest and realistic understanding of our fundamental strengths can help us in answering this question. With little effort in this direction, we can nurture, cherish our relationships and spread joy and happiness in all spheres of human interchange.