Friday, April 22, 2011

In Complete Honesty...

Dear God,

"For it is the richness of honesty,
     This clown is after.
     Do not think to judge him by his grinning face,
     Do so by the subtle trace of what that humor knows..."

Four years... and I stand here again. In my quest for honesty, I stand again at your footsteps to seek answers.  It’s easy to lose a part of oneself as one travels through the by-lanes of life. As emotions and adult responsibilities edged into my life, I have drifted away from the joy of living.  Now, I seek to experience the door-opening power of reconnecting with what I truly cherish – to be myself again.
During the past few years of turbulence, part of me felt unwelcomed or suppressed as a child not able to voice his opinion.  I have lost my special quality – inquisitiveness, friendliness, spontaneity, confidence or another related trait – for it was frivolously put to rest by factors which held a special space in my life.
Every day, I wake up to realize that I don’t know who I am. With a feeling of emptiness, I don’t even like myself…feel like running away. I want my real self back, but who is that, anyway?
Lost in transition…I wait here for my angel…my angel who will be my wings and help my dream of being myself again, take flight!
Prenditi cura di te...
il vostro Abhijith

Signed: 22nd April 2011
Place: Vatican City