Life – A lonely Walk

Well, we human beings tend to notice the differences much easily than the similarities. Probably this is one of the reason why most of us are reluctant  to see changes. Before I proceed further, I wish to state why I intend to call life a lonely walk, perhaps its even more interesting to notice the fact that I wish to address it as  “A” rather than “The” .What most of us don’t notice or are blissfully ignorant is the thin line of difference between   understanding  what domains are to be treated as a group activity and what domains are to be treated as one’s own efforts. The existence of society, community is valid to the extent that we tend to be one among others who has got similar thought process and motivation which I wish to address by calling it  “A” lonely walk rather than “The” lonely walk. It would be appreciable if one understands that the definition of society or community ceases to exist beyond that point wherein every individual tends to create an impression about himself and his actions alone would be responsible for the image that he portrays which is the reason why I wish to call it a lonely walk.

This piece of writing was pursued during the time when I was fortunate enough to attend a talk by Steve Jobs - his life presents itself as an apt example for others to learn from. What I wish to talk about  is not about the cultural, social or political differences that exist for as a matter of fact they exist and are clear enough to be noticed. What I wish to point out  is the fact that how loneliness helps you at times in understanding what you truly are as a person and what you truly need out of life in terms of the emotional support that you need,  the freedom that you wish to enjoy and the extent of commitment that you can promise on personal and professional front.

I salute Steve Jobs for his relentless efforts to innovate and make our lives simple and better! May his soul rest in peace! (Added  Oct 8 2011) 

Date: July 23rd 2006

Posted: Simply Me!

Location: LA - CA           

Diabolic Act: Mephistophelian Glint in Her Eyes

Every relation goes through a phase when one is suppose to rediscover the reason for being in a relation...or if one cannot do so, may be move on. Not everyone is well equipped or receive formal training to handle relationships. Relationship is not something which one can restrict using a time domain. It is important to realize that the equation changes but relationship continues to exist, although with different set of rules defining the dynamic. 

We all have our own ways of mourning. For Albert, it is to literally do what his heart desires at that moment – being alone and shutting himself off from the rest of the world. Today being no different: Albert was lying on the sitting room sofa – with his legs on the window sill, his dark brown eyes staring straight up at the roof. Occasionally, he makes sounds that make no sense to the untrained ear and screams in a deafening, high-pitched tone when he cannot get to control his emotions. Every so often, he flaps his hands uncontrollably in the air. Sometimes, his body starts to violently jerk – been his daily routine since past few weeks.

Around evening – after 7 hours of staring into thin air…he rolls up his sleeves, gets up and walks towards his desk. Settling down to write his diary, he is lost in thought. It was a long entry—almost two thousand words—for his day, too, had been eventful recollecting moments of the past.

Entry in Albert’s Diary – March 11^th

I have stayed up late too many nights pondering this question. I think back of my relation. I never really understood if any bit of her emotion was true. Does that mean I’m just that naive or did I just pick the wrong woman? Almost everyone I know has been cheated on; I couldn’t be the lucky ONE that has never been through such an experience, could I? After all, most of the present day women are unfortunate reflections of destiny – a bad joke by nature which went horribly wrong.

The reason this question has been consuming my thoughts for the past six weeks is because I think we had a warm relationship – worthy enough for a decent and respectful exit. All the signs were there. She was distant and angry with me for no reason. She denied any wrong doing but her behavior - more so, her reasons, were still suspicious.

One day – truth was out. It made me feel sick to my stomach. She lived a life of thousand lies….

To be continued…

P.S.: This blog post presents a first view/glimpse of the chapter titled 'Diabolic Act: Mephistophelian Glint in Her Eyes' of my book (not yet published) titled Precocious Truth: Unrequited Love. You may read the prologue for the same here